I have been commenting on this article over at Babeled and it got to me to thinking that I wanted to explain why I refer to myself as The Movie Whore. I am sure no one was wondering which is the number one reason to do it. Again this is my show and my warped brain. So her ewe go down the rabbit whole into the twisted and scary place that is my mind.
Qualifications to be considered a movie whore.
- Must have received gonorrhea of the eye from watching movies that are so bad they should be outlawed. Examples: Including but not limited to Zombie Nation, any sequel to Attack of the Killer Tomatoes, Transmorphers, Alone in the Dark or any other Uwe Boll movie.
- You know what a Troma movie is and you watch them avidly. Examples: Toxic Avenger 1-4 and the cartoon. Tromeo and Juliet, Sgt Kabuki Man NYPD, Terror Firmer, Surf Nazi's Must Die and others.
- Must be able to cross genres with your knowledge. Examples: Christopher Reeves was not only Superman but also made a movie with Jane Seymour (Yummy) called Somewhere In Time. You know that Russel Crowe worked with Denzel Washington prior to their latest theatrical outing and you know the name of the movie. Worth 5 cookies.
- Know obscure shit. Examples: Christopher Lambert is a master swordsman that is nearly legally blind. Ellen Barkin was once in the Porn industry. Rebecca Demornay has a doctorate in Psychology. The Last Starfighter was the first movie to extensively use CGI and the technology was originally pithed to George Lucas for for the original Star Wars.
- You own Xanadu. I do.
- You have worked or currently work at a video store because you wanted to. Examples: I have done this twice. I actually worked in a video called Ray's video that had the most complete collection of movies in California and was next door to Ray's Liquor. So yes the original Clerks spoke to me on a very personal level. I can walk into a room and within 5 seconds name the movie on the TV even if I have not seen it. Give me the plot and I can name just about any movie that has come out in the 30 years. 5 cookies to anyone that can stump me. Using IMDB is cheating.
- You know the movie this quote was used in. "No matter where you go, there you are." 5 Cookies to anyone that can name it with out looking it up and 5 more for being able to name 5 actors in the movie without having to look it up.
- You thought the argument over whether or not destroying the second Death Star was morally wrong was one of the most brilliant things you have ever seen.
- You re-watch movies you know are bad just because it has been a while since you have seen it. Examples: Refer to this article I wrote a while back.
- You own or would like to own the following movies: Including but not limited to Ice Pirates, Big Trouble in Little China, My Big Fat Independent Movie, Xanadu, Starship Troopers, The entire Kevin Smith Collection, entire Mel Brooks collection, entire Monty Python collection, Any Godzilla movie that does not star Matthew Broderick, Far Out Man, The Last Star Fighter, Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure and Bogus Journey, and the Evil Dead Trilogy.
- Lastly Bruce Campbell is one of your personal heroes.
16 comments:
No. 4 - Highlander is my all time favourite movie. All the sequels were shit, but the 3rd was the only bearable one. Of course, number 2 completely took apart the first film and should not be called Highlander 2.
10 - Big trouble in Little China, Starship Troopers, entire Monty Python collection, The Last Star Fighter. Damn I love those films! Of course, I am English so therefore I was brought up on the monty python side of life! BTiLC - Kin Catrall's best film. Which OK, it aint hard...but hey!
And the bad news is they are making another Higlander flick with the Adrian Paul. I think it is already in the can as a straight to DVD release.
You're telling me you didn't love Mannequin, or Star Trek 6. I understand passing on Mannequin.
Bollocks bollock bollock. Big hairy bollocks. I wrote a huge reply, hit publish, didnt notice it had told me the word verification was wrong and I hit bye bye. Ugh. Dammit.
I had written why I hate mannequin. The soundtrack. I hate it. It makes my ears bleed it is that bad. And then I said I am more of a TNG ST guy, and was never a TOS ST guy. So she was never going to win points with me in that film.
And then I was saying why Adrian Paul will never EVER be a highlander. Lambert looked nuts. His eyes showed someone who really wasnt at home!
Ugh. The original reply was so much better. Damn you Blogger.
One of the reasons I want to get my own site.
I will always be a fan of TOS. Captian Kirk is one of my heroes. I was raised on the show.
I hear ya. I was raised on TOS too, but I think being a teccie, it is the CGI of TNG that got me as I grew up, so i jumped ship and went there!
Right. Cat is about to hav kittens. Well, I think she is. Mucus everywhere and weird meowing and contractions going on... So I will chat ya later bud.
They have actually gone back and reworked the effects for TOS so now it looks a lot better.
They reworked all the CGI? So does it make huge difference, and does it take away the way you felt about it originally now it looks different?
No sleep at all last night. 4 kittens born instead. I am knackered!
I think we should turn number 8 into a round table discussion, complete with a carefully selected panel of elders.
Actually I love the updated effects. It gives a better idea of what Gene Rodenberry had originally dreamt up when he created the show. I seriously want to buy the whole set.
I am getting ready to have kittens myself. I have a little pregnant slut kitty. I am looking forward to breeding my python. That I can make some money on.
Well Greg you Jack and me and Sy will meet up with you for a few beers and see just how far we can take this one.
"a few beers". You mean in the first 20 minutes right! But hell, that sounds awesome. I could do with a good convo! Just lemme know where it is. Make it London. Saves me the airfare! Dammit. Now I want beer!
That's as good an excuse as any to get over to London.
I was telling my buddy about this and we determined we would actually need a good single malt scotch and cigars. London sounds as good a place as any. I have always wanted to go and this way we can all stagger back to Sy's place and pass out while his wife makes fun of us.
Talking of a good single malt, I have been enjoying Glenfiddich recently. I highly recommend it. Currently giving Jura a test drive. I go to shop and try a different whisky every time. Works a treat! I have an awesome collection of empties! Any recommendations are warmly accepted.
So hell. You boys get over here, I will supply the whisky and we will put this blue globe we live on to rights. Whisky style. And then yeah, let the wife point and laugh. Although if she wasnt pregnant, she would be there enjoying the whisky too! One of the reasons I married her. We used to spend a night with me, her, some kind of take away and a bottle of brandy. No sleep til empty.
I highly recommend Edradour (not sure of the spelling) It has a cinnamon quality to it. Very good.
Brandy sounds so good right now. With a good hand rolled cigar and some good blues.
Brandy. Brandy brandy brandy. My wife bought me table glass warmers and we bought a good bottle of hennesey. Saddest moment of my life so far as the last drop touched my tongue. I should go to bed before I go drink any more!!
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