Let's take a look at slang that I have heard recently that makes me want to crack some one in the head for sounding like a twit. Oh and feel free to leave comments about things you have heard that makes you twitch.
I realize I got old somewhere along the way and maybe I don't get it and I am glad because if I ever get it with some of this please just shoot me.
Any use of the word nigger or any variation there of(including nigga and others I have seen). This word has never and will never be cool to say ever no matter what color you are. It is a word that makes you sound stupid when you use it. It's use automatically even temporarily means your IQ has dropped significantly.
"That's sick!" Meaning cool. I get it and have even found myself using it. I did resist at first but it grew on me like a fungus.
"You just got Pwned!" or powned or what ever. Apparently some jack ass can't type and was on some im program and typed pwned instead of owned and some twit thought it was a good idea. I have been around people using this term and frankly it makes me want to slap them around and call them susan(3 cookies for any one that can name the movie).
"Phat" do I really even need to go into why this is not acceptable and makes you sound like a dolt.
Anyone that thinks these crazy sex tortures are cool in any way shape form or fashion should be castrated. I am speaking of terms such as dirty sanchez, angry pirate, donkey punch and others. If you don't know what they are then use Google. If you are fond of using these terms and think it's funny to talk about doing theses types of things to women then you are a worthless sack of flesh and deserve to have your balls fall of like in the scene in Planet Terror. Oh and you deserve to contract gonorrhea of the eye and have syphilis in your nose while having your cock inserted into live light socket. Women can be a pain in the ass at times but so can men. Good rule for sex. Make her toes curl and take her breath away with one or more earth shattering orgasm most of the time when you have sex and you will be able to get away with a lot but you abuse the provider of sexual gratification and not only do you never ever get away with anything but you will be pumping your fist for a long time because girls talk and news gets around.
My girlfriend uses a term that really just missed my age group by about 3-4 years. "DOOGANS" or is "DUGANS" I am not sure and I could ask her as she is sitting across the room but when she reads this I am going to be in enough trouble anyway an prefer to put it off til then. Now she has explained to me what a doogan is several times and maybe it's just the term itself that just strikes as wanting to say "A what!" It's a generational thing I get that and this is one I just don't get but does not make me want to cause harm to anyone or make fun of them in anyway. I love you baby.
For the love all things musical what t is Emo and why would you choose to describe yourself with this term that screams "I am a WHINY BITCH THAT IS IN DESPERATE NEED OF DRAWING NEGATIVE ATTENTION TO MYSELF BECAUSE IT"S ALL I CAN GET!" Then I saw one these twerps and thought to myself "Oh it's the new goth." Should this be the case was there really any reason to switch from goth. I could see saying "Goth chicks are hot." However I don't think I could ever say "I think Emo chicks are hot" for fear of some one thinking I was talking about a baby bird of some sort.
Other things I just don't get. tattoos and body piercing also known as body art are not a political statement. A political statement would be actually making a statement using words whether written or spoken to express praise or disapproval for a particular and relevant social issue.
BUY PANTS THAT FIT!!!!! I am not only talking about stupid skinny dudes that wear pants 10 sizes too big but also some weight challenged women that wear clothes that show the cottage cheese through the material. Oh and everyone please wear a shirt that covers your stomach. Men and women a like. Don't take this to mean I have something against the non skinny, I am not skinny, I wear pants that fit and I don't wear shirts that shows my gut hanging over my pants to the world. No one wants to see it. Wear it around the house not out of the house.
FIX YOUR HAT! Wear it the regular way with a nice bend in the bill pulled down covering your hair line or wear it backwards but for the crying out loud don't turn it sideways or cocked off to the side or flatbilled. YOU LOOK LIKE A TOOL! The same thing goes for trucker hats. They are trucker hats and only truckers should wear them. Ashtoon Cutcher be damned to hell for all eternity, or however he spells his name.
Lastly, I would like to tell white guys and white girls everywhere, "YOU ARE WHITE DEAL WITH IT GET OVER IT MOVE ON! Watching any one try to imitate the social culture of others looks like a turd. Really does anyone want to see me in a monk outfit(shut up), I would look ridiculous. Think John C Reilly in Anger Management. Certain cultures can carry off certain styles and behaviors and white Americans can not carry any of them off. Nor should we try. There is a difference between appreciating a cultural and just pissing them off. I have had many a conversation with African Americans that look at white kids trying to act like they're from the ghetto who have told me that it really makes them want to slap the little twits. It shows how little they truly know about what it is like to live in the inner city where shit can some times be seriously screwed up and this really can be construed as offensive. Yeah I know it sounds weird when I am saying don't be offensive. Well let me put it this way, there is a right way to be offensive and then there is the let's kill that stupid twit approach.
Lastly the one thing I will never understand is Ebonics. Never have never will. I am sure it has it's proper place, but anywhere outside of that place amongst people that do not speak that way makes you sound like a moron. Whether you are cool or not has nothing to do with what you say but who you say it to, it matters not where you are from, but where you are and just because it looks good on MTV doesn't mean it will look good on you.
Lastly, I know but I mean it this time. Will some one please explain this fascination with the winner of worst celebrity blow job award winner Paris Hilton. She's not pretty. Not real bright. Is a world class slut and some how young girls think this is what they should strive to become. When did the youth of
Well that's it for now. Have fun kids and remember to always wear headphone when doing your homework. Another 5 cookies to those that get that one.
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